dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Randomize
