um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
this hospital has no fireball
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
