This is not my ceiling
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
