You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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