just tell him i said nine months
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
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