They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
