It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
