I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize