If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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