have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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