3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Randomize
