I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
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