i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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