I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize