Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
