I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
