just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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