That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
i need some magic done to my vagina
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Randomize
