Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Randomize
