2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Randomize
