For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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