Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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