the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
