I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
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