I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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