her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
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