I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize