would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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