you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
