ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
