Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
