I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I would ride that face into the sunset
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
