Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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