So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
