You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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