the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I am never drinking with the goths again.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Randomize
