i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
