Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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