He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
