Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Randomize
