You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Randomize
