Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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