she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
