I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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