I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Randomize
