SEEEEXXX PLEASE
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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