its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
You can't just leave with hair like that
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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