She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
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