the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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