Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
You made out with two different species that night
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
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