And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
