I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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